Friday, June 1, 2012

Should I get a fanny-pack?

For all of you born after 1995, this... a fanny pack. 

Let me give you the top 5 reason why fanny packs are a good choice:

1. You belongings are conveniently located, right at your fingertips...literally... right at your fingertips. Just let your fingers dangle where they naturally fall, right in front of you, and they will land *in* the fanny pack. How convenient! No huge bags, or copious amounts of zippers. No searching through deep dark holes of backpacks or purses.

"Just a regular day at Home Depot, need a new bucket and large broom, where's my money, oh wait, *here* it is, conveniently located at my fingertips."
 ( Hulk Hogan, and if you don't know who he is then I don't know if you're welcome at my blog anymore).

2. The require no hands. You see, the name itself implies that there is no need for hands or even arms, or even an upper body, for these little gems to work. FANNY pack. You just need a fanny. Everyone has a fanny. I have a fanny. You have a fanny. And they should all be put to good use.

A fanny, being put to good use. 

3. Aside form a large electronic you can put most anything in a fanny pack. Your keys, your money, your phone, your MP3 player, etc. A couple pens, a little notepad, even a diaper and a little wipe holder could fit in there. And if you live in Texas...

Yep, that right there is a gun, folks. Nothing like having a loaded weapon strapped to your mid-section to make you feel super safe.

4. They are super trendy. That's right. I said it. They are! Have you seen all the celebrities that have been sportin' fanny packs lately? It's "hipster," it's "retro," it's ironic in a cool hipster retro way. Now, I'm not one to fall for all the new trends but this one just makes sense! Fanny packs are the future in fashion.

Is it just me or does the girl on the far right look like she is about to cry. Probably because she forgot to put her head through the neck hole of her shirt and she is feelin' priiitty silly right about now. Regardless, she is rockin' that coin-purse-on-steroids fanny pack.

5. You can make them yourself!
Belt Pouch Sewing Pattern (Download)
Cute and functional... 
Absolutely no way for me, but definitely a choice.

P.S. Why the heck am I writing about fanny packs? fanny packs? really? the car ships out on Tuesday, we still haven't figured out what exactly to do to the house and it sort of looks like we were recently robbed in here. ALL of the kids had a stomach bug for the last week and a half which means the laundry has been nothing but sheets, towels, and gross clothing...which means no one has any clean regular clothes. I have misplaced my phone, my iPod (new and very snazzy), my wallet, my keys all about 5 times each. And that's why I'm writing about fanny packs. Because if I buy one and wear it and everything is in one place, right at my fingertips, all day long, then maybe I'll feel like I have something under control. 

Hope ya'll have a lovely weekend! 

P.P.S. Martin's answer: "No, absolutely no, what are you talkin' about?"


  1. My first instinct was a definite NO...but then I think you may have actually convinced me that you need one. You wield some strange power, woman!

    1. I do need one. I am totally looking into getting the coolest, hippest, not looking like a real fanny pack I can find. And I am going to buy it, and use it, an it will be attached to my body at all times, unless I'm asleep.

  2. They might be in fashion again, but still... designers are making sometimes such a horrible choices!

    1. Hahaha...yeah, I don't really think they will be back in fashion for real, ever again... I'd have to actually *be* a celebrity for it to acceptable.

  3. Definitely get one...but be aware that "fanny" means something entirely different in British English.

    1. This is funny because Martin and I were just talking about how the Polish and English languages do not meld well. There are so many Polish words that just sound bad in English...and vice versa. Noted. I will not use the word "fanny" in public. ;)

  4. It's not a Polish/English's an American English/British English issue. Fanny is a whole different part of the female anatomy ;)

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