Me vs. the oven, and one snail

Well, I finally bit the bullet and figured out the oven. Kind of.

First of all, this oven comes from IKEA, so it can't be that weird. And although the instructions are in Polish, I do have a native speaker that lives in the same flat as me, you would think this wouldn't be such a big deal. Honestly, we just haven't had the time to figure out anythign more than the mocrwave to re-heat food, until today.

I decide to take a chance with something simple.

Sugar cookies.

Ingredients (pictures taken with my IPod, NOT my fancy new camera which we don't have an adapter for yet...grrr...)...

Unsalted butter. 200g = 14tblsp = 1 3/4 cups, just the amount I needed.  I know this now. I know things.

Flour (Mąka) and Sugar (Cukier). Notice: the flour bag is not that much bigger than the sugar bag. This is the 3rd bag of flour we've opened since we've been here. Why are the bags of flour so small, Poland? Why?

Vanilla. I know. I was confused as well. Even more confusing is that the recipe calls for 2tsp. But this stuff is the "aroma" of vanilla and incredibly thick. I used only one tsp. and it turned out fine. 2 tsps. would have killed us. Oh, and 2 tsp. would have used the entire bottle.

Baking Powder. Comes in packets. I'd say about 3tsp. worth in one packet. One batch of pancakes for our family takes 2 1/2 packets. We have lots of packets.
Packets.

Eggs. The eggs here are rainbow colored. By which I mean that each one has a different colored "white." So, one might be blue, another green, and if you're really lucky, you get one with all the colors, Martin says it's because the mountains are nearby and the air does something strange to the chickens.... or I might be making all that up.
 Eggs are eggs, ya'll...nothin' to see here...move along...

All of these things, (plus some Wieliczka salt), together, produced this...

A little unevenly baked perhaps but tasty.

Delicious, tastes-just-like-they-should-albeit-a-little-flat-sugar-cookies. I blame the flatness on the sugar OR the extra yolk in my double yolk egg that got in there. It happens.

The oven. Well, it did it's best to discourage me. It has three different oven settings. Convection from the sides, convection from the top, and conventional. It didn't fool me with it's fanciness. I chose conventional because I'm conservative like that and it worked alright. Every time I opened the door the oven wanted to shut off. It's an environmentally friendly oven, it cares about the ozone. Or it's just lazy. There was a lot of extra beeping that went on, because it's also a G rated oven, and some flashing lights...I don't know what all that was about. But, I will, in the end, prevail, of course. Because I have a brain, and the oven, decidedly, does not.

The children were very eager to try the cookies. I let them all have one and then sent them outside in their galoshes, as it had just stopped raining. At which time they found a lovely (huge) snail with a broken shell. They were all a bit concerned for the snail. I was a little concerned as well, but what are you gonna' do? That's nature (Goulet!...sorry, had to throw that in there, just ignore it).

We don't have snails in Texas. There just isn't enough rain. But here in Poland they are absolutely everywhere, and I think they are awesome. I never get bored watching them. Nor do the children. So here you go... (you also get to hear Martin try to teach Kacio how to say "Felek," to no avail).

An Octopus through a one inch hole.

Right now I'm just trying to keep things in perspective. I'm failing pretty miserably but that hasn't kept me from trying. Martin says my posts have seemed negative since we got here. The underlying fatigue, daily frustrations, and overwhelming nature of this whole move has made it difficult for me to whip out any fun and Disney-esque posts . Sorry, Martin.

Truth be told, I am feeling very out of control right now. Everything I have built up in the last 7 years, all my hobbies, all my recipes, all me routines, have been completely dismantled. And to begin to put them back together is proving to be near to impossible without the right tools. They are here, these tools, but finding them is time and energy consuming. And there is the matter of the four children...

Perspective is needed, friends. Because every time I am near to tears at these feeling of  helplessness and complete loneliness I have to remember that is also just a part of moving. Not a part of Poland, but a part of moving to a new place. Were I moving to Virginia or Maine, or even North Texas, I would not know where anything is, the best places to shop, or any of the people. Heck, in some parts of the U.S. I might not even completely understand the language. It certainly isn't Poland that is holding me back, it's just the move.

Oh yeah, and,  It's only been two weeks... get a grip you NINNY!

In closing, a little story to help us all keep things in perspective...

Last week I made the whole family take a tram into the Old Town to find a little Pasmanteria called "Kłebuszek." It has been said that this little shop is the best place to find yarn in Krakow. So far I have found this to be true. It is small, with only one wall of yarn but I discovered a nice section of 100% wełna (wool) in just the right weight. I purchased my yarn, brought it home and cast on. I had come to a point in the main body of the piece that required me to knit for 3 inches in the main pattern. I thought I had 3 inches but I really wanted to measure. I couldn't find my ruler. So, I searched the internet for a true to size "one inch" length and this little diddy popped up in the mix. I so very very rarely click on Youtube videos but this time I decided to take a little detour and I'm glad I did. I watched it, and it made me smile. That was enough.

Perspective lesson for today: I am trying to figure out how I fit in here, finding peace with the limitations and embracing the places where I can flourish. After seeing this video I know that I can at least be grateful that I only had to move from Texas to Poland, and not from the vast ocean to this little tiny glass box. And so far no one has forced me to try and squish my body through a one inch hole. So, I'd say I have it way better than this Octopus. And that's a start. 

P.S.   ;) ;) ;) j/k, j/k, j/k, lol, lol, lol. :p

Some backyard pics.

 Kacio and Lina are clearly having trouble with the move. Kacio is on an eating strike, except for ice cream of course. But, a boy who went from human garbage disposal two weeks ago to refusing all food and just demanding to nurse, is clearly having issues of some sort. I blame the move, and expect him to be right as rain soon enough. It's just frustrating. And Lina, well, Lina is just Lina but on about an 8 all the time, as opposed to about a 5 which is what she had finally achieved right before we left. This too shall get better. Right now my ear drums are bleeding from the screaming and crying in this hollow, echo-y empty  house and my nerves are a little frayed. I am managing to keep my patience though. I have to understand their share in this, and it's a big one for such little people.

We have made great progress on the house in the last couple of days. Mostly shopping at IKEA means that we have to put all the furniture together ourselves which is fine, but it also means that it takes several days to come together. All in good time. At least we have the kitchen.

The weather has been rainy and cool but it will warm up again tomorrow. I haven't gotten tired of the weather yet. The rain, or the cooler than normal air. I know all will be eager to tell me how much I will hate it next summer after a winter of precipitation and cold, but I love it for now. And now is all I really need to worry about.

Our back yard.

A large cherry tree in the far back right corner of the yard. An old swing used to hang here and all that's left is a rope. it's great big ol' tree.

Walnuts. Not quite ready.

One lone raspberry from a neighbors yard that managed to grow on our side of the fence. Hey, it's  on our side, it's ours, right? 

Apples! Tons of them. They're gettin' there...

Plums. Coming along nicely.

Not the whole yard but an idea of what's out there.

Of course, there is a pile of wood, so it must be kicked and destroyed.

Food of the day.

We went to a Baptism today. It was a nice Mass and Baptism and afterward we went to a small party to celebrate.

This was not a party to rival the infamous Polish wedding reception, but it was still a really nice obiad (2pm dinner) with many courses and more food than anyone could eat. I was tempted to take a picture of my plate at one point after I had accumulated a little bit of everything they had on the table. It was colorful, well-rounded, and altogether delicious.

What you must know about these kinds of gatherings, especially if they are held at a restaurant or hotel banquet area, is that the dinner begins around 2pm and continues on into the evening until it's time for a light supper. The food which we had been eating for over an hour was just obiad, then an "in between" course (which included the "exciting" food of the day, I'm getting to that), and then later, after we had already left, they were to serve "supper." An insane amount of food! Along the way there are many different kinds of drinks of course, and at some point vodka was put on the table, although no one really touched it that I could see. Maybe after we left the party really got started. I don't know. All I know was that there was so much food I couldn't see straight and that some of the food was of a type I have never seen before. Like this...

I was the awkward American who took pictures of the food before eating it.

Similar to "head cheese" which I have eaten before, thanks to Martin's dad, this little dish consisted of chicken, peas, carrots and hard boiled egg in a gelatinous mold. Awesome. All the food groups, if you include the lemon wedge and exclude the carb factor, which is pretty trendy these days anyway.

 I ate some. It was not horrible. That is all I have to say abut that.

It was a day spent with family we haven't seen in two years and a nice drive through the countryside from Krakow to nearby Wojnicz. A lovely Sunday.

Living in the kitchen.

The past couple of days have been about as we expected. And accept for the machine at the Carrefour eating our cash card, which means we have no way of getting cash here in Poland for quite some time (those of you who live here know how much of an inconvenience this can be), everything has been ok.

We are tired, and the children are cranky, and the jet lag means that we are all up at all hours of the night.  But, again, this is how it always is the first week or so and the second night is always the worst.

We haven't even begun to unpack as we are just trying to stay fed and rested up to this point. But that ends today, because I am tired of living in the kitchen.

The kitchen in our house was redone last summer. It is really a great room. And because it has been recently redone it has a completely different feel from the rest of the house. We are all drawn to it and have "set up camp" here in a sense. The other rooms are for sleeping only. Of course, there is no other furniture in the other rooms. No chairs or sofas so we all gravitate tot he kitchen. It is the one room that I will be doing very little with because it has already been done. I will add a "pantry" and perhaps a moveable island for a little more cabinet and counter space but otherwise, it's quite perfect for us.

The kitchen:

Hejjo was the only one awake in this picture. He is having a rough time, folks. A really rough time. Poison Ivy is horrible. The high chair plus a crib were both purchased form IKEA the first evening here. Kacio is such a little prince!

The cooking and dishes area. Counter tops, etc. There is a really nice, huge dishwasher hidden in the last cabinet on the bottom right. Quite a luxury!

The view from the balcony...my chimes will be hanging right out here for all the neighbors to glare at as they make just enough music to compete with all the dang dogs, howling throughout the night.  This picture was taken at 5:30am. Bright outside, no?

The kitchen may be perfect for us, but the rest of the flat needs to be ready to live in as well, mainly for my sanity's sake. It's so hard to wait!

Living life day to day. Starting now.

For the past couple weeks we have been living life almost moment to moment it seems. Each day was specially scheduled to include as much as possible, from fixing up the house to spending time with friends and family,and last minute errands in between. 

Isn't this true of the big life events? New babies being born, seconds count. The dying person, that last breath, a single moment. And while not on such an important scale as the welcoming in or passing along of life, our move has indeed been such an occasion. Every moment has been counted. 

And now we're here. As soon as we are able to breathe and rest, we will be able to start living life day to day again. Soon, very soon.

But we're *here*! At last!

The trip was pretty brutal, I'm not gonna lie, and there were some extenuating circumstances such as a Virus with a high fever and vomiting (Lina, perfectly fine now of course), a bad case of Poison Ivy (on Hejjo's FACE, and other parts) and some hideous turbulence on the dang propeller plane form Berlin to Krakow that nearly had me passing out . But, to quote Ma Ingalls, "all's well that end well." And no more need be said about the last day and a half of travel. Ever. ;)

We were greeted by family and friends at the airport, brought home to a feast, of course, and an upstairs apartment ready for us to make into our own. 

The weather is amazing. Cooler than Texas but warm enough for shorts and t-shirts. Breezy and cool in the evenings with a sprinkle of rain. All the windows are open to let the breeze (and bugs) in. The roads are worse than I remembered but the foothills are more beautiful. Everything is so green here. And now that I see it through the lens of "home" rather than "just visiting," these are only some of the things I am weighing as pros and cons, keeping things in perspective as well as allowing myself to get excited about the future. 

I *am* excited. A little intimidated, but not scared. I've been speaking as much Polish as possible and not doing too poorly and little Felek is already starting to respond to people in Polish. 

Now that we are here we will be doing many things to get school and work and the house ready for the Fall, which is when family leaves and we are officially alone and living, working, and schooling here. We need a routine and we need to slow down a little. This we can do. Starting now. Thank goodness. 

Also...

Thank you, sincerely, for the many prayers, thoughts, and well wishes. They certainly held up more than one plane today, located not one, but two, airplane sick bags *just* in time, and gave me the grace and patience to keep from punting little Kacio across the plane when he didn't sleep but 2 hours the entire transatlantic flight.  ;)  

  

Heard from the backseat...

Mommy?

Yes, Adelina.

Mommy, do I have Texas in my soul?

Oh, yes you do, baby. Deep deep down in your soul.

Good.

Shooting your own dog.

If you've ever watched the movie or read the book Of Mice and Men, you might remember the part of the story where the old man's dog needs to be put out of it's misery, but the man can't bear to do it, so someone else takes the dog into the field and shoots it. The old man states moments later that he should have been the one to shoot his dog. After all, he says, "he was *my* dog."

I always remember that part of the movie book. It made an impression on me. And I know what he means.

When you love something you want to come full circle with it. As hard as that may be at times, it is just as important to be there at the end of it's time, as it was to be there at the beginning and for every moment in between.  Our relationship to "things" is very much tied to how they came into our life, how they leave it, and the part they play while they are around.

I was feeling low about all the money being spent on the house. All the time being spent, when we have so little time left in Austin before we board our plane. And why are we fixing up the house just so some random strangers can come in and knit-pick their way to a lower price? Don't they realize how much time and energy and money went into all of this? And they want 2k off because the light fixtures are "old?" Are you kidding me?! Yes, I even got angry at the future, potential, fictional buyers.

Until today.  I was diligently scrubbing the trim and doors with my Magic Eraser, grunting over the blood splatters on the bathroom cabinets from Hejjo's many late night nosebleeds and the many many swirls of crayon drawings on the window sills and bedroom doors and I began to smile, and think...

We could have put in these floors years ago and enjoyed them ourselves but we didn't. We didn't because we knew that little babies were going to be learning to walk. We knew that older children were going to wrestle and we knew that sometimes mommies and daddies would want to get down on the floor and play too. And carpet is better for these things. Carpet was best. We could have painted the walls a nicer color, covered up the marks and stains and dirty hand prints. But we knew there would be more. Because even when the older two grew up enough to "know better," the next two were right behind them, sneaky permanent marker in hand. Letting it go was best. It was fine. The dishwasher worked and no one cared that a couple prongs were missing or that it was really loud, because when it's your turn to put the dish washing tab in, and click the little door shut, nothing else matters.

Instead of investing in new floors, and walls, and fancy appliances, we invested in people. We invested in life.  Our time, our energy, and our money, for the last 7 years, went to that one endeavor. And our house allowed us to protect and love and educate that life in it's very own un-fancy, run down, lived-in way. The best way.

Stripping out the carpet, painting over the hand prints, and fixing all the holes is my way of putting the house to rest. Covering up and removing the life that was there.  Leaving a clean slate for someone else. And I'm glad we're the ones doing it. I'm glad we're the ones spending the money and taking the time and energy, because it has been a big part of our life. An important part. And this is the right way to let it go. 

Where we will be living.

 I know I've mentioned it before but all this talk about selling the house and dealing with the house and wanting the house to be DONE, has got me in the mood to share a little about where we will be living. Plus, "ddd" won the giveaway and she asked where we will  be living in relation to the center of Krakow.

I should start by saying that, barring any reason to completely avoid photographing where we will be living for some sort of security reason or something like that, I will be taking copious amounts of photos of the house, the yard, the trees, everything. (before and after's! I am looking forward to this, very much so) This is not the end of this conversation by any means.

We will be living in Martin's family home in the northeastern area outside Krakow's center. It is very near Nowa Huta.

Map:

"A" is the Stare Miasto (Old Town). City Center. "B" is the general area where the house is. A 15 min. drive in moderate traffic. Not bad. Public transportation takes about 30-45 min.

The house was built in the mid-80's with a definite function over form mentality. It's kind of a country house. Which just means that it's not fancy in any way but keeps you warm and dry and it's free...what more could you ask for?!  It consists of two full "apartments."  Identical floor plan upstairs and down. When Martin was little the family lived throughout the house but now that the family only visits in the summer it is usually just the downstairs that used with any regularity. Although I have never visited when both floors were not bursting with people.

We will be living in the upstairs apartment and Martin will have his work space downstairs in the "office" and we will be converting the "t.v. room" downstairs into our schoolroom ( I could not be more excited about this)! My goal is to have a living space upstairs and a working space downstairs and to not use the other rooms downstairs at all (the last thing I need is  *two* kitchens to clean). And of course, this coming summer, and next summer, we will have family living downstairs so we will have to adjust our work spaces to welcome them home.  I fully intend on using the basement to its fullest potential, whatever Martin and I decide that means for us. And of course, the attic, which is actually up another flight of stairs (as opposed to the pull-down-nearly-decapitate-you ladders we have here in Texas) will be used to hang clothes to dry when it's raining or snowing outside, unless I get myself a dryer, of course.

The yard is massive and covered in fruit trees (cherries, sour cherries, apples, pears, and plums). Martin will tame the lawn and we intend on planting a vegetable garden in the spring, along with some new berry bushes (strawberries, raspberries, gooseberry, currant), roses,  and possibly welcoming a family of chickens.

I have ideas. Lots of them. It will be our home as well as our school and work place and I want to make it feel like home. And throughout all of this we intend on buying land as soon as possible and beginning construction on our own home in the Spring. It's going to be a crazy full year. Plans and hard work.

One week! 
One week.

It never gets old. How the children will be traveling...or so they say.

Feliks

Apparently I was doing "it" wrong in this picture, whatever "it" is. She knows.  I never do.

Hejjo. Silly, silly, Hejjo, 

Kacio was very busy while we were taking silly pictures.  Aquafresh is his personal favorite. But Colgate is a close second, as long as it's watermelon flavor.

Selling our house (part 2)...blood, sweat, and tears

We decided to sell the house after all. We did the math and it made the most sense. Even if we were staying in the U.S., at this point, we would be selling our little house. It's a great time to sell in Austin, better than probably anywhere else in the nation, we are fortunate in this way.

We spent this past weekend moving everything out, which is still in progress, but mostly done. And now we are fixing up. Pretty much everything in our house will be new. New floors, new paint, new roof, new dishwasher. New, new, new. Can you tell I'm excited?

old dishwasher. a workhorse for over 12 years, served us well for 5 of those. 

Old.

New! Don't have a shot of it completely done because by the time they finally got it in there my camera was packed up. (again, notice my ingenious baby-proofing on the cabinet to the right.)

Our furniture on it's way to my brother's house.

Testing paint for the walls. Neither of these colors is going to do. Back to Lowe's tonight!

Tearing up the old vinyl laminate to make way for fancy tile.

In my youth my father would sometimes come home during a rough patch at work (he owns his own company) and would say, "Sheri (that's my mom), we're bleeding money, Sheri!" Didn't quite understand what that meant at the time, but it didn't sound good. I understand now, and it sounds even worse. (Although if we literally bled money, we could quite quickly weed out all the greedy people in the world, don't ya think)?

We are bleeding money right now. And that's just what happens when you move your family, across the street or across the world. It happens. I'm not happy about it. I'm not happy about the idea that we have to put so much money into a house where every person around me is saying that people will line up to buy it regardless of how it looks inside, the market is that "hot." But we're doing it anyway, because that's just what you do. Apparently. It's not leaving a great taste in my mouth. I also don't like the idea that we are spending our last days here in America on this dang house. In fact, I can't stand that part of it at all. But Martin didn't want to do it sooner. So here we are.

I've hardly had a chance to really wrap my head around the fact that we are leaving in 9 days. 9 days is nothing. If I stop and think about it long enough it feels like the ascent up the roller coaster. Where you still haven't fully confronted what is about to happen, because you don't have to. You haven't reached the top yet and every second that you aren't free falling, is one more second where you don't have to fear it. So, that's where we are. That's where I am. Strapped in tight. Taking care of kids while Martin paints the house. Taking care of kids and re-packing everything to make it fit into 7 suitcases, while Martin paints the house. Taking care of kids and trying to make the most of our little time left here for at least a  couple years, while Martin paints the house.

The tone of this post, if it can even be called that, is exactly how I am feeling right now. Ugh. I wanted to write a better post. Something fun, inspirational, but I'm not really feeling either of those things right now. I'm not depressed or sad either. I'm a bit tired. And a bit numb.


P.S. speaking of numb... Martin managed to injure himself late Saturday night with a sharp blade used to tear up the floor you see above. A trip to the E.R., 2.5 hours, and a few stitches later, and he's as good as new. Sort of. He'll live, but it does make it harder to paint...